Short term experience, long term nostalgia

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Do you sometimes feel like you need a change? That you do not really know where you belong? That every day just seems the same ?

That is basically how I felt before I decided that I wanted to do something about it. Something that scared me a little bit, but also seemed so adventurous and exciting. After I started reading a lot of blogposts about it and started binge watching Youtube videos about it my mind was set: I wanted to go abroad.

First I had to convince my parents who were not as enthusiastic about my idea as I was. They thought I was too young (14 at that time) and they just did not want me to leave for such a long time.

After a while ( and a lot of begging) I could talk my parents into visiting the ‘’Jugend-Bildungsmesse’’ in Frankfurt with me. At this fair a lot of organisations that host exchange programs introduce themselves, their exchange programs and returnees talk about their experiences. There I got to know the organisation Kaplan (unfortunately they stopped doing high school exchange programs). I really liked their American High School program, so I immediately signed up for an application interview.

Shortly after the interview I got accepted into the program which was connected to a lot of paperwork. After this was done the process of waiting started because you never know when you get a host family. I checked my mails almost everyday and I was really excited once I heard that a family in Michigan would like to host me. We started FaceTiming and texting a lot prior to my stay, so when I got there it almost felt like I already knew them. This was really helpful because it did not feel like we were strangers to each other when we met.

But before I went to Michigan I had a preparation weekend in Wuppertal. Together with 24 other prospective exchange students I got the chance to talk to former exchange students about their experiences and we talked about our fears, potential difficulties and hopes regarding the next year. It was a really good preparation and wiped away a lot of the worries we had. I also got to know a lot of really nice people from all over Germany there, that I am still in touch with.

Another pretty amazing experience was that my exchange program started with a 3 day trip to New York. Although the farewell was hard flying to New York City with a plane full of people your age made the tears dry pretty quickly. We stayed in a hotel full of exchange students from all over the world. I shared my room with a girl from Norway who I’m planning to visit after the Abitur. The whole weekend just felt like a school field trip which I will never forget.

From there I had to fly on my own for the first time which was really stressful, especially because we did not get a lot of sleep in the city that never sleeps. I was really happy when I arrived in the small airport in Grand Rapids, the city I was going to stay at for the next 10 months.

Although I had a great time with my host family and did a lot of fun things with them the first couple of days were really tough. Every time I heard words like ‘’family’’, ‘’parents’’ or ‘’homesick’’ I started crying and it was just strange knowing that you would not see your friends and family for such a long time. Once school started and I settled in with my American life, I got so busy that I could hardly find time to talk to people back home.
And after a while my host family felt more like a real (2nd) family. My host siblings and I just got along so well and we still address each other as ‘’brother’’ or ‘’sister’’ sometimes. I especially bonded with my host sister who is the same age as me. I always wanted a sister and it really felt like I had one.

School was probably one of the best things about America. The school system is pretty different to the German school system. You have the same schedule every day which makes the classes a little bit more intensive in my opinion. However, I think school was a little bit easier than in Germany but that also depends on which classes you choose to take.

After school I did cross country during the fall and track and field during spring time. In my opinion it is really important to participate in extracurricular activities during an exchange year because you get to know a lot of people and get to experience and be a part of the school spirit American high schools are known for. No matter if you win or lose your team stands behind you and everyone supports each other as much as they can.
One of my favorite memories about my high school year was probably ‘’Friday Nights Under The Lights’’. Every Friday afternoon the whole school went to the school’s football game and cheered for their team. No matter if the game was 2 hours away everyone would go. Another special thing about high school football games is that they are always themed. The first game that I went to for example was a ‘’Beach Out’’ so everyone would dress up like they were about to go to the beach. The spirit and unity of the students always amazed me and I was really happy to be a part of it.

Of course it was not always perfect. Sometimes it was really tough being ‘’alone’’ so far away from home. Being constantly surrounded by a different culture, language and mentality can get on your nerves once in a while. During these times it is important to talk to people about it and I was really glad to have other exchange students in my school that helped me whenever I was sad or confronted with a problem.
There is a German saying ‘’man geht, wenn es am schönsten ist’’ which perfectly describes the last couple of months of my exchange year. It really takes quite some time to build up real friendships and to get to know people that you actually like and connect with. It really hurts when you have to leave those people not knowing when you see them again. Of course we stay in touch and know what is going on in each other's lives but it is not the same. Everytime I look at old pictures and videos I almost start crying. I know this sounds really negative but I’m really grateful that I got to know these people and I would not want to miss them in my life. In the beginning 10 months seemed like an eternity but looking back it just feels like nothing. Time flies when you are having fun.

 I always imagine my exchange year as a treasure of memories. Yes, I share some of it, but it is mine and no one will ever truly understand what I experienced, unless they do it themselves.I’m beyond thankful to everyone who made this experience possible. I met people from all over the world and got to visit places I never even imagined going. If you get the chance to go abroad: DO IT! It may not always be easy but getting out of your comfort zone is really important to grow as a person and to find yourself. Exchange is change.

Yasmina Krznaric MSS 12